It’s not always easy to find positivity in the middle of being separated from so much of normal life, but just now as I was washing my hands at the end of a long day I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror and for the first time in a good while I half recognised a younger, better version of myself.
The dark circles under my eyes have gone, and they no longer feel heavy. I even have a bit of colour due to having been able to spend time in the sunshine. I’m still riddled with anxiety (in fact I didn’t realise how bad it had become till I was thrown out of my nice safe, dull little routine) but apart from when I overdo things a tad, I am finally no longer feeling permanently exhausted.
I have new coping methods and have had lots of time to watch films instead of just eating some food and going off to bed as I got in from work. Even the insomnia is abating a little.
I won’t lie, it was a rough few weeks at the start of all this, as I have mentioned elsewhere but tonight, that glimpse in the mirror, it was nice to see her again.
Now if she could stick around for a while, I have a bunch of friends from the last decade or so who really should meet her once this lockdown is over.